The feeling grew again,
it hit me like a sleeping bag full of sleeping pills
in the grocery store
shopping alone for the first time in years.
It hit me so hard I could have unzipped the thing
and slept for the decade -
but I would twist in bittersweet dream,
I would remember how I used to sit on the couch
in the complete dark
and how she would kneel in front of me, head bobbing
while I watched myself grow inside of her mouth for a while,
and then I’d stare at the blank computer monitor
like it was a black mirror growing in a white sea
of euphoria.
It was all powered off but only temporarily because
the internet is an invasive species, just like our hearts;
always growing,
always smothering;
bursting at the zipper.
I’ve been having this dream for the last month
where I am driving and there is hardly anybody on the road
but I keep cutting them off screaming
How the hell am I ever going to get home in this goddamn traffic
and a voice says
Honey, you are growing impatient with the language and the yellow lane
Sometimes I imagine that our nature
with all of that sunlight and water
grows too much in haste
with the weight of a heavy burden,
an unsustainable harvesting
of agriculture to benefit others.
No comments:
Post a Comment